Women Of A Certain Age ~ Saying No

I recently came across this article, The Secret Life of 40-year-olds: 14 things they don't tell you about the middle-aged, and I found it very interesting so I decided to elaborate on it in one section at a time.

Now this is in no way meant to alienate anyone of any other age or gender, it's just that I'm a woman in mid 40's now (or a little bit past) and I can relate to this and anything before it since I've already been there. It's not saying everyone woman in their 40's will go through any or all of this either, but it does make for interesting conversation.

The first thing on the list is

"1. We say no to all manner of things that we might have previously have accepted.

"This includes any social engagement that requires standing up for extended periods. Gigs - once my night out of choice - must now be seated and within an hour’s travel of my home. Queuing to get in anywhere is out of the question, and music in bars must be low enough to allow conversation. Table service is preferable; clear access to bar and clean loo, a non-negotiable. A last minute cancellation feels like a Lotto win for all concerned.""

I have to agree with this one. I've found as I get older I realize how precious the time I used to squander is and I'd rather spend it doing something I enjoy with someone I enjoy doing it with.

In my early 40's I started going out to clubs and dancing again but found the recovery time from a night out, started taking longer and longer. What I used to be able to bounce back from in a day, now took all weekend or longer.

When I recently started going out to listen to bands again I have to admit, the volume of the music, although I enjoyed it, was overwhelming and you really couldn't talk to whoever you went with. We ended up texting back and forth to have any sort of conversation at all. This isn't to say I still don't enjoy going out to see a good band live, it's just I've found I've changed in how I enjoy it. Where I used to want to be front and center so I could feel the music pulse through my body, I now prefer to be further back so I not only enjoy the music but the company of the person I am with.

I find after working so long during the day and the week by the time the weekend gets here I really just need to recharge myself and I prefer to do things close to home if I even go out or leave the house at all.

I also found I say no to working more hours than I used to. I used to be able to stay longer but now I have just enough energy to get through the 9 hour work day and the 40 minutes each way drive before I'm all tapped out. Now I'm not sure if this is age related or adrenal fatigue related but I do get tired a lot quicker than I used to and it takes me a lot longer than it used to to get my energy back.

Sometimes its all I can do to come home and take my dogs for their mile walk in the evening after dinner. If I even feel like making dinner that night. That's another thing that's changed. Where I used to love to come home and cook a nice meal even for just myself. I really don't feel like dealing with it or the mess you have to clean up afterwards. So sometimes I grab take out on the way home or throw a pizza in the toaster oven (can't tell you the least time I even turned on my actual oven since I got the toaster oven) or sometimes I just have a bowl of cereal or ice cream for dinner. (yes ice cream lol)

I have found myself returning to more creative things I can do at home that I used to do when I was younger. Like crochet, drawing, reading, or writing short stories of my own. I do tend to also like to watch TV and try out new shows when I find one that interests me too.

What changes have you found taking place as you grow older? What things that you used to enjoy do you find yourself coming back to? What are some things you do to recharge your battery after a long work day?